Choose You Blog

Some people are blessed with an abundance of energy.

Me?

I love to nap.

I’ve always wanted to be that person who craves exercise, who looks for more opportunities to get outside and get my blood pumping.  But I’ve never been that person.

I want to be able to wear my boys out.  I want to be able to join in on every activity.  I want to be that woman with the glow in her cheeks and the energy of a kid.

This commitment to be active three times a week is a good start for me, but I realize it’s just a drop in the bucket.  Tonight that has me down.

How do I become that woman who craves vegetables and fresh fruit?  That healthy woman that looks great for her age?

Can I change at 40?  Is it possible?

Tonight it doesn’t feel like it is.

When I started this journey, I listed my goals for achieving a healthy lifestyle. A couple of weeks later, my diet is still slightly irregular and I’ve definitely fallen short of eating fresh veggies and fruits at least once a day. *hangs head* I set a goal to workout during the week. Accomplished? Hmm…not unless you count my power walk to and from the office and that’s more of a stress reliever than exercise.

I’m starting to wonder if I have an issue with commitment. Here’s how it goes: I set my sights on a goal, lock in on it until I either get bored or have another goal/thought replace it. What’s crazy to me is that this is my health! Who doesn’t want to be committed to living a better, healthier lifestyle? Bleh.

The great thing about life though is that we are given a new day to start afresh and build on what we did (or didn’t) during the previous 24 hours. So, I’m not going to spend too much time feeling frustrated with myself! I’ve recently forced a couple of my friends to drag me to the gym with them, and even scheduled an Outlook appointment to remind me to eat. Baby steps, right?

If there’s one thing that I’ve realized so far, it’s that choosing me is a process and a lifestyle change. There’s no magic wand…And, I certainly can’t click my favorite red shoes and appear at the finish line. I am determined to make my health a priority and while all the steps may not have fallen in place yet, I’m proud of the small actions that I’ve taken thus far.

Today, I’m choosing to put any committment issues aside. What are you choosing to do?

The last few weeks, I have lost some motivation.  Ironically it started right around the time I made the commitment to Choose You, and subsequently announced I was going to run in a marathon this year.

Prior to Choose You, I didn’t announce my goals, or “put them out there” to everyone.  I’d tell a few friends what I was hoping I could do.  I’d sign up for a race, and write about it on my blog.  I guess you can say the pressure is on, and I have a fear now- what if I can’t do this? 

Another factor coming in to play is the conclusion of my divorce.  It had been going on for a year and a half, and any divorce that takes that long is complicated, and usually not very easy.  At the end of the court trial last Wednesday, it was finalized, and I felt completely drained. I missed posting my blog post here last Thursday, because I had no energy after the trial to write anything.  I think the conscious and unconscious stress that has been present for the last year and half has caught up to me. 

Health-wise, my latest blood work shows I am extremely deficient in Vitamin D.  The dose of radioactive iodine I had last August has depleted my Vitamin D levels.  My doctor said this alone could account for my fatigue.  She has prescribed a second round of prescription Vitamin D, in hopes that will raise my levels back to the normal range. 

All of this compiled has resulted in very little motivation or desire to run.  The other day at the gym, I ran a third of a mile, and felt like I had run ten miles. (It is painful to write that!)  I was tired, winded, and wanted to just stop, go home, and go to bed.  I forced- and I mean forced -myself to keep going, and I ended up running 6.5 miles at a 9:10 pace, but my heart and my head were not in it. 

I was going to try an ambitious mountain half marathon in June, but I have no desire right now to put in the hard training I would have to do to run it the way I planned to.  I have been riding my bike more lately than running, and am really enjoying that.  I have been building up my distance and speeds, and I’m not worrying about setting any hard or fast goals.  Right now, bike riding doesn’t feel like work, and running does.  Fortunately, cycling is good cross training.    

I have still been running on average 10 miles a week, and I am going to try to keep that up.  I hope over the next few weeks, I will decompress from everything, and my motivation will return.  I have worked really hard to get to where I am, and I don’t want to just let it slide away.    

Last week I was running on the treadmill at the gym, and having a really hard time just completing a 5K distance (3.1 miles).  I had run 2 miles and saw I was on pace to finish at over 30 minutes.  I haven’t run a 5K distance in over 30 minutes in months.  For the first time in a while, I felt that drive and motivation kick in.  I turned up the pace to run almost two minutes faster for the last 1.1 miles.  It was hard, but I did it and finished in 28 minutes. 

When I was getting off the treadmill a man came over to me and told me “very nice run-especially at the end.”  He said he used to run, but didn’t anymore.  He said he was going to ask me if I run in races, but after seeing me run at the end, he wanted to ask me now how many races I have won.  It was a very nice remark from a stranger, who knew nothing of the funk I’ve been in, didn’t know that was one of my slowest runs, and I’ve been struggling.   But I knew.  And the part that he said was very nice was the end- when I was running like I know I can, when I’m motivated.   

I am not sure what I really need to do, to get my running motivation back.  I hope I can figure it out soon though, because I have a marathon to train for. 

If you have any ideas, comments, or suggestions, I’d love to hear them. 

Heather is a one-year thyroid cancer survivor, and a single mom to two boys.  She lives near Longmont, CO, and has blogged extensively on her cancer diagnosis, surgery, and recovery at her blog, A Mama’s Blog.  Heather enjoys spending time with her sons (ages 6 and 4), running, cycling, hiking, and gardening.  Heather’s Choose You Fitness Goal is running in a marathon this year.

This week’s post is going to be an Update and a Giveaway…

I’m happy to report that even with additional temptations this weekend [It was my mother's birthday and we got her an ice-cream cake, chocolate volcano cake, and cheese cake.] I was still successful in my goal to not eat sugar. It actually wasn’t hard at all to resist, I think because it has been over two weeks, I’m just not craving the sugar the way I normally do. So that’s a plus!

Off topic:  Do you want to see the Birthday Dance of my mother that I made with the American Cancer Society’s new dance application? Here’s the link – Frances Ellen Disco Dancing (Feel free to tease her about it in comments, she loves all the attention). 

OK, back to my post.

Since I was so successful with my first (two week) commitment, I decided to make a longer and more difficult commitment next. For the next six weeks I will be continuing to avoid sugar, but I will also eliminate high fat/calorie snacks and junk food, and lose 5 pounds.

That’s a lot…But you think I can do it, right?

So that’s my new commitment.   Now for the giveaway.

Since I know my Choose You Commitment is going to get more and more difficult to stick with, I wanted to do something to increase my online support. It may sound silly, but I love getting comments of support and tips from my readers. And the more feedback I get, the more encouraged I become. So I asked the folks at the American Cancer Society if I could do a giveaway. Not only did they say yes, but they agreed to donate a Choose You Stainless Water Bottle and a Choose You Lapel Pin.

All you have to do is leave a comment on this post and you will be entered to win (I’ll announce the winner when I post next Tuesday). Any comment will do, but like I said in my first post… I could use all the support I can get.

Thanks everyone…I’m looking forward to hearing from you. 

Also See:

• Join The Choose You Movement with Ellen Pompeo of Grey’s Anatomy.
• Are You Addicted To Sugar?
• Eat Healthy For Life, Not Weight Loss

Catherine is the mother of two teenagers, she writes about health & wellness at BlogHer and catherine-morgan.com.

A photo of me reflected in the lake I walk by every day.

I wasn’t really trying to lose weight; I was just trying to maintain. The weight I was at was about 5 to 10 pounds over what I thought was my ideal, but it was satisfactory. My doctor approved, my BMI calculator approved, and I was satisfied it was good enough. But since making my Choose You pledge, Ive veered away from frozen, boxed meals, cut out coffee (except on Sundays), watched what I ate more carefully, varied my exercise routine and when I stepped on the scale, I was down five.

Maybe it’s cutting the coffee. Maybe it’s varying the exercise. Maybe it’s summer — so my appetite is down and so is my “well layers will hide it” excuse. Maybe it’s just that much more work to walk in the heat and humidity.

Or maybe it’s just overall making healthier choices. Anyway I’m not looking a gift horse in the mouth.

A lot of people look at me and think my gift horse is just luck. I wish they knew how hard I work to stay at this size and keep in shape. I wish they knew I struggle daily too, with my weight and health. I wish they knew it wasn’t easy and just luck. I wish they knew I cut things from my diet too, and that, despite all my best efforts, I still have some areas that I’ve just accepted will never improve. Not at my age, or at least not without suddenly becoming a Hollywood celebrity with an entourage that includes a personal trainer and dietitian. I wish they knew that I don’t think anything about anyone at any size because I’ve been there too. I wish they knew a few years ago I dropped 50 (now 55) pounds.

When I finally got motivated to lose weight and get fit three years ago, I had overcome quite a few obstacles. I had a lot of bad habits — dealing with hot and long summer days with the kids by making all too frequent milkshake runs, for example. I lacked good habits — daily exercise. I  was moving into my late thirties after having had two children. I had a load of excuses: I had no time, I had two kids, where would the kids go, what could I do, it felt too hard, I was too tired, it was adding stress, other efforts had failed, it wasn’t that bad was it, my hormones were wonky from pregnancy and nursing and on and on.

A friend said she was joining Weight Watchers and I decided to join her. I knew I needed help and truthfully, the accountability. By joining a group, I got support, tips, suggestions, reminders of good habits, and of course, weekly checkins. Not everyone wants a group but those same elements can still help. Journaling eating and exercise is useful. Having a partner or support system can too (and you are WELCOME to use me, right here). The Choose You pledge is great accountability.

Most importantly, though, is that commitment — do you have any lingering worries, doubts, excuses, or obstacles? What are they? Let’s talk!

My biggest right now, as a confession, is that point of Good Enough. I lost the weight, I exercise every day, my clothes fit, so…it’s good enough. I haven’t been challenging myself, though, or continuing very reliably on my goal to improve more on the progress I’ve made. Dropping the five pounds, though, has sort of re-energized me to consider the next step in better fitness and diet.

I’m doing pretty well with skin protection. I’m writing this in the shade while wearing SPF 50. And next week I have my biopsy. I figure come what may, if I’m in the best shape possible I give myself better chance all around.

I’m looking forward to sometime  in the future when I can report having a week that went smoothly and uneventfully.  This wasn’t it.

My decision to participate in the Choose You program took a little shove suggestion  from my son.   This week my cat joined my support team— by peeing on some chocolate chips I was about to eat.….thus supporting my goal of less sugar and overall “moderation”.   (Aside from “Eating Right” I have other goals to come in future weeks.)

Like most people, for me sticking with any program is way harder than starting.  I wish I was blessed with an iron will and a little discipline.  Unfortunately, I’m not.

I am, however, really good at coming up with creative excuses.

For instance: Mother’s Day—-obviously was a piece of cake.

This weekend—a similar opportunity arose—when I was confronted by another major challenge—-a place that is the very opposite of “moderation”.

Alot has changed at the Disneyland Resort in California since my last visit there,  maybe 15 years ago.   Like a whole new park (California Adventure) for one thing.

But some things never change.

Disneyland is still the happiest place on earth— and far from the healthiest.

So I’ll just say I’m feeling relatively good about myself compared to past trips.  To balance out half a churro probably I should also mention the funnel cake ….. I walked at least five miles through the Magic Kingdom and the California Adventure to find  what my daughter claims is the healthiest food you can possibly find for dinner at Disneyland—a vegetable roll and edamame.

Considering the risk/benefit ratios, I think I escaped from an entire day with major fun and minor damage.

I’m on Week 2 of my Choose You commitment–to be active 3 times a week.

My Choose You check-in day is Tuesday, so my workout week starts that day.  This week, I had completed my three days of being active by Thursday.

It felt weird.

I hustled my butt on the treadmill for thirty minutes a day on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday.  Thursday was by far the easiest day.  I worked up a sweat, my heart was going, but my legs didn’t hurt too much.  I had that good feeling you get when you can feel your muscles, but no pain.  Friday rolled around and all of the sudden I had this weird thought.

I actually felt like I “should” get my 30 minutes in that day.

Okay, you have to know me to know how weird that thought was.  I love naps!  I was an athlete in a previous life, but I’ve never been the biggest fan of feeling my pulse all over my body.  Here I was wanting to go work out?!  This was only Week 2.  Hasn’t been long enough to form a habit.

What is happening to me?!

Friday was gorgeous.  The sun was out.  It was warm.  Off I went this time in my own neighborhood–music in my ears.

For the record, even using the incline on the treadmill it’s not the same as the long, rolling hills you get out on the street.  I was worried that I wouldn’t keep up the pace I do on the treadmill.  Thought if the beat of the music slowed down my pace might too.  I consciously kept pushing myself to keep up my rhythm.  I checked the clock on my ipod at what felt like the halfway point and sure enough I was fifteen minutes into it.  So far so good.

Then came the turn for home.

Is it really supposed to be that hard to breathe?  Were eyebrows created just to keep the sweat out of your eyes (thank goodness for my bushy ones)?  Jeez that last fifteen minutes was tough!  I tend to zone out in the gym.  There isn’t much thinking that goes into walking in place staring at the wall.  Out on the street, I was looking at gardens, watching for uneven sidewalks, trying not to get hit by cars, figuring the best route and watching my time.  Honestly, I probably was a minute short, but I was toast.

I did not enjoy those thirty minutes on Friday.  What was I thinking adding an extra day of exercise?  But you know what?  I was so freaking happy I worked out four times this week.

So I don’t like exercise yet, but I love that I’m doing it.

Amie Adams doesn’t love exercise yet, but when she does you can bet she’ll be talking about it here and on her personal blog Mamma Loves.

This week I had to put my Choose You commitment of exercising three days a week on hold because of some sadistic perodiodontist who insisted on tearing open my mouth and cleaning out what she claimed was an “infection” oral surgery. The surgery itself went well and thanks to my new constant companion Hyrdocodone, I survived. The rest of it was a learning experience.

Because I am that in tune with and on top of my calendar, I brilliantly scheduled oral surgery just before one of the busiest weekends for the family. My in-laws came into town the night of the surgery. We had two soccer games, a dance dress rehearsal and recital and my husband went off on one of his rare business trips the same day my in-laws left, leaving me care for my kids, who promptly came down with fevers and sore throats, by myself. That and keeping up with my own antibiotics, steroids and pain meds was WAY fun.

The morning I was supposed to go back into work I sat in my kitchen paralyzed. I was exhausted — mentally and physically. The lack of exercise and all the meds had wreaked havoc on my ability to sleep. Even so, I was trying to psyche myself up to suck it up and get back to the office. I had never been out this long. I had things to do, people to see.

Then it hit me — WHY? Why am I pushing myself? If I needed more time to recover, why don’t I just take it? My husband reminded me of the vacation time I had available to me at work, which I almost never use up. I emailed my boss and asked if he would mind if I took more time. His response — “You need to do what’s best for you.”

For the remainder of the week, I worked half days from home so I wouldn’t be overwhelmed with work when I returned and I took the afternoons to relax and recover. And I can’t tell you how much better I feel because of it. I will be ready to get back to work full-time tomorrow.

So even though I had to put my official “Choose You” program aside, I still ended up choosing me. I hope this inspires you to choose yourself too, even if you’re not yet, “with the program.”

By the way, in my official role as corporate shill, I must mention that if you haven’t joined the program, here’s a brand new podcast that explains what this program is all about. This is the latest installment of our Powerful Choices podcast series that’s designed to help us make healthy choices in our busy lives.

Also, this weekend marks the 97th birthday of the American Cancer Society and as The Official Sponsor of Birthdays, ACS is all about birthdays! In the 97 years we’ve been around, through the important work we do every day to help people stay well, get well, find cures and fight back, we have saved millions of lives from cancer and created that many more birthdays. To celebrate our birthday, we’ve created this new very fun birthday dance program — turn yourself into a dancing king/queen and send it to someone you know!

Amy Swygert is Vice President of Strategic Communications Planning for the American Cancer Society’s National Home Office. She’s a busy wife and mom of two beautiful girls and in her almost non-existent spare time, she blogs at her personal blog Up With Moms.

Julie says, 'I choose skin care and thank goodness I did!"

It was just this little spot. An annoying little spot on my nose. It would start to go away and then would flare up, get a sort of crusty scab, then fade down to something like a scar. When it first arrived, I thought it was acne. It was on my nose, after all, and it flared up during PMS. But it never went away, it just kept cycling up and down as my body cycled up and down.

The thing is, I knew it was something. My mother had skin cancer years ago when I was in college. She went in for a day patient surgery to have it removed, and it all began with this annoying spot on her nose. In my early twenties about twenty years ago I had this mole that was exhibiting those “red flag” symptoms and the dermatologist excised the area and sent samples for biopsy. Nothing, thankfully, but the doctor warned me I was the poster child for skin cancer, and the pre-cancerous spot on my arm was a big screaming warning.

I heeded it, and became diligent about limiting sun exposure and wearing sun block. I always wore hats out, too. As a result, my skin looks pretty good for my age, but…it was not enough and too little, too late.

That spot on my nose was why my big Choose You goal was skin care and skin checks. So yesterday I went to the dermatologist for a long overdue skin check, and she found several areas of skin cancer. The spot on the nose, she treated right away. The rest are a little more complicated and I go back very soon for treatment of those. The bad news? Skin cancer. The good news? I got a check and it is all caught early. The shock? The area of largest concern was not even a spot I worried about. I thought it was just a no big deal freckle.

As soon as I got home I notified my Choose You group for support. I knew they’d accept my whining and give me the love I craved. The second thing I did was dive into the Google, as much as I knew that was a bad idea. However, I went to the American Cancer Society’s skin cancer facts site and got really good, non-scary information.

So how did I get skin cancer and what does it mean?

I am fair complected, got sunburns as a child, have a family history of skin cancer, and I am in the sun every day (with sun block on). My skin has little melatonin, and responds to UV by freckling. I also have moles, some of which have been atypical.

The important thing is that I got that check. So we caught this early and can treat it with one of the simple treatments, including cryosurgery ( liquid nitrogen freezing off of the area) and excision or Mohs.

The worrisome spot on my nose is very early stages and was treated with cryosurgery right in the office. I’ll return for a biopsy of the other areas. From that point, we’ll know better what the situation is and the best method of treatment. Right now, my doctor suspect, based on visual, that it’s all local. That’s good news. Basal cell and squamous cell carcinoma have a very high cure rate.

Read the rest of this entry »

I’m happy to report that I have had a successful week avoiding sugar, but it hasn’t been easy. The first few days were the toughest, and filled with temptations.

Usually when I start something like this, the first thing I do is clean out the kitchen of all temptations and stock it up with healthy alternatives. But this time is a lot different. You see, we’ve recently become a multi-generation household, and my mother is an out of control snack-a-holic. This poses a bit of a dilemma, and since purging the house of all my mother’s treats isn’t really an option, I am forced to live with the temptation.

For me, the biggest temptations are in our freezer. Snickers, TastyKakes, ice pops, fudgesicles, chocolate ice-cream, and more.

This is the kind of stuff I have to put up with.

As if these temptations aren’t already enough, I keep dreaming that I’m eating all the candy from the frig. In my dream it’s so real that I actually feel anger and shame at myself for not having the willpower to stick to my commitment. It’s so real, that I wake up questioning myself. Did I or didn’t I?

Then, back in my real life, I am having a small problem with my referee (my daughter) and my supporter (my mother). It seems they’re having some trouble understanding the concept of helping me avoid the sweet treats. My referee keeps forgetting and offering me candy, then she blames it on not having a whistle. She seems to think that to be an effective referee, she needs a whistle. Then my mother’s idea of support is asking me to bring her candy and buy her creamsicles. I’m really going to have to sit these two down and explain to them the do’s and don’ts of being supportive.

The good thing is, nothing they did to unconsciously sabotage my commitment worked, and I got through my first week. In the end, that’s the most important thing. Here are a few of the things I did to keep myself from giving into the sugar temptations…

1. I ate as much fruit as I could (frozen blueberries are my favorite).
2. Sometimes I mixed the fruit in with some low-fat yogurt.
3. I’m getting back into drinking my Isagenix shakes. I always feel better when I’m drinking them, and going off the sugar has helped me be more consistent with that (since they taste a lot like an ice-cream shake).

Something else I’ve done that may seem strange but it has helped me stay off sugar this first week…

I allowed myself to still eat some chips and pretzels when I needed something to munch on. This is something I do to make stopping the sugar a bit easier. It allows me to still feel like I’m indulging in some “forbidden” foods, so I don’t feel deprived during my critical “getting off of sugar” period. This may sound counter-productive, but there is a method to my madness. Once I’m past the two weeks of no sugar, it’s much easier to begin to eliminate the other unhealthy foods in my diet. I think it has something to do with how sugar makes me crave something salty and visa versa.

So there you have it, I’ve made it through week one of my two week challenge to avoid sugar. Once I’m off sugar for a full two weeks, I plan on making a new Choose You commitment that will challenge me even further. Until then, please leave me comments of support and/or tips that will help me stay off of the sugar. I need all the help I can get since my mother and daughter seem to have an unconscious desire to sabotage my goal.

Also See:

• Join The Choose You Movement
• Are You Addicted To Sugar?
• Eat Healthy For Life, Not Weight Loss

*Catherine is the mother of two teenagers, she writes about health & wellness at BlogHer and catherine-morgan.com.